Why I love my kids

Ask any mother if she loves her children, and you will hear a resounding yes. What a foolish thing to ask a person who has carried a child, given birth, stayed up at night, hurt when they were ill, and rejoiced when they accomplished the ability to FINALLY use a toilet!

Ask any mother how she loves her children, and the answers that are to understand. After all, this is a person who remarked on what color your spit and poop was.

Ask a mother why she loves her children, and this is where you see the most beautiful and tender path to her heart.

Emberleigh is the oldest, and the only girl. She has a spirit in her that can tame wild beasts. She is a peacemaker, a compassionate young girl who will love anything that comes her way. She is quiet, introspective at times, loves poofy girl dresses, the color pink, and thinks that people in Hollywood are wonderful. She is my twin in how she looks, in how she acts, and how she handles things. That is both a wonderful thing, and a distraction at the same time.

She has always been compassionate since the day she was born. She was born with big feet(at the age of 11 she is wearing women's 9 1/2 shoes), and an old soul. I remember commenting when she was first born that she looked like a little old man - far too wise were the eyes that looked back at me from birth. She was patient with me. I was new to being a m0mmy, and she was very willing to allow mistakes, never judge me for my incapacities as a new mother. As she has grown, she is considerate of others, thinks she can do anything...anything except cleaning and homework. I once declared to her that I would someday marry Keith Urban...and when she heard that he had married Nicole Kidman she had the compassion and love of a child to ask if I was hurt or mad at Nicole for marrying him. She has style beyond her years pulling outfits together that a grown woman would not be able to muster. She is growing into a young woman, and with that things have changed with her body. But through and through she is such a tender spirit who loves her family, and thinks the world of her friends.

Tyler is my second born, and all boy. Thank goodness for this because there is far too much estrogen in our household as it is. He was the most wonderful baby to have around - rarely cried and rarely shoved his place in the world...that is, until he turned about 18 months old. He is very much a new spirit in how he views the world. He can be impatient, and difficult at best, but also the sweetest boy any mother could call her son. He is the reason I love baseball (even if he does not like it as much as I do), and the reason I have been able to look at life in a different way.

In 2nd grade he declared he wanted to be an artist; he has the soul of an artist. He once asked me while listening to Michael Jackson's "Billy Jean" if the song was about a stalker...you can not help but love a child with such insight to the world around him. Smart as smart can be, he is astonishing at his ability to grasp new ideas. He will pull me to the side away from his sister to talk about things, just mom and Ty. These conversations range from girls, to video games, to questions about the world around him. I feel priviledged when he poses the questions to me.

As a single mom, I find being a mom at times to be difficult. I am the only one around to answer questions, to care for them in the middle of the night when they are sick, to ensure all homework is done and teeth are brushed at night. At times I am struggling to determine who I am as Ruthe, much less who I am as Mommy. But through it all, my kids are always there for me to laugh with, cry with, and share the most amazing moments of truth, love, and happiness. They allow me to view the world through new eyes, allow me to have fears and hidden secrets. They allow me to love this world I am in, for all the beauty and all the pain. They have taught me more about myself than anyone else I know, and have helped me to discover a deeper insight into this world I am in. It is hard without their father, but through it all, they have been the best decisions I was able to make. As I told a friend one day, "My children do not define what I am, but they do define who I am." I am a mom with amazing children who are the light of my day, and the glow of a moon at night.