Wouldn't it be nice if people came with warning labels when you meet them or see them on the street?
For the guy who talks too close and has bad breathe - it would be nice if you had a caution sign reading "Caution - Close talker in need of tooth brush".
For the girl who is not really going to commit to a situation, it would be nice for her sign to read "Caution - I play with people's hearts".
For the kids who throw tantrums, and the parents who are as bad as the kid they should have a family sign reading "Caution - We don't believe in respecting others".
It is amazing what you may learn about someone just from watching their body language or how they speak to another person. Sit on any park bench for at least 5 minutes and you will encounter a world of contradiction and surprise.
I love to people watch. Not everyone has negative signs. There are amazing people in this world who would not need a caution sign. I like to figure out what people's signs may read. I find this to be a great hobby when I have nothing else to do. Sometimes I am cynical, other times I am in awe. But always, it is a curious hobby to entertain. I try to not be judgemental; after all, would I want the strangers I am judging to judge me in the same light? I don't have that "give a damn" attitude some people are able to pull off. And it seems during different points in your life when you may be struggling with something, that is when you run into every Tom, Dick, and Harry who remind you of your oppression. It can also be moments when you needed to feel something, and happen to watch an exchange between 2 strangers that reminds you life is wonderful.
In a relationship I find holding hands to be very important to me. It is a gesture of each person protecting the other, wanting to touch each other, create a united force as one together. But when you are not a couple? It is taunting and mean. They don't know they are offending me, how could they? They are walking around in the Mary Poppins world of butterflies dancing in the sky, blue birds whistling a happy tune, and oblivious to my envious stares. To me, I see them leering at me, almost saying "Yeah, this is what you DON'T have, and so we are going to rub it in your face!" But avoiding the feelings of disdain for the couple's existence, I can look past the rainbows and butterflies they are seeing.
I can see a man who may be looking at his (insert official title of date/girlfriend/fiance/wife here) and be able to tell how he feels about her. The look in his eyes when she is not looking - is it a look of tenderness, a look of desire, a look of "I am the luckiest SOB in the world to have her at my side!" OR - is it "yeah, can't wait til this chic is gone", boredom, or dismissal.
I can see a woman who may be looking at her (insert official title of date/boyfriend/fiance/husband here) to see her thoughts and feelings. The look in her eyes when he is not looking - is it signifying a look of respect, admiration, adoration, "Hell yeah!" look. OR - is it "um...I am just really filling my time", dismay, etc.
It is the looks you give others when no one is looking that matter the most in people watching. That look when you can tell, feel, and see 2 people in love. That look when you see a mother watching her child proudly watch her kids take big kid steps, mixed with the look of worry at the same time that they may not be as needed in the future. You can see the nervousness a teen aged girl or boy may feel when in a group of kids and it is obvious they are trying to flirt with someone. The embrace between two friends, whether it be verbal or physical. One of the most endearing events is to watch a couple who are older, shuffling where ever they are going, holding hands, smiling, and just enjoying the other's company.
Body language is not often looked at highly enough by most people. The simple turn of the head, how close someone stands to you while talking, is their body facing you or turned away from you, are their legs crossed while sitting down and which way are they crossed. Do they look you the person in the eyes while speaking, over the shoulder of the other person, down to the floor, up in the air? Are they constantly playing with their phone, camera, electrical device instead of talking to the person they are sitting with? Do they seem interested in the conversation, or are they simply feigning interest? Someone can give you a compliment, but it is more their body language that will reveal their intention. Paying attention, and knowing the difference between genuine and insincere is the key.
How do you know the difference, though? How can you tell that what you are reading into is the true person? There have been times when I was wrong about my interpretations of someone else's body language. In those rare moments I am typically pleasantly surprised. Those moments are rare, however. This is not a sport for everyone, but for those that have either learned how to read others, or are gifted naturally it helps out immensely when avoiding people who should be avoided.
What would my caution sign read? "Caution - I watch people before engaging in conversation."
I watch people before I engage in conversation for my personal, social time and comfort. If I am meeting new people that are friends of friends, I become extremely introverted for a moment. I look at how they talk, walk, move, gesture. I determine if they are safe or scary. I will watch how the talk to the others to determine if they are schmoozing, snowballing, or being sincere. I will inspect the situation before talking to them, before possibly becoming a victim of an assaholic. I am okay standing in the shadows, on the sidelines, whatever you want to call the place I am at. The rare exception to this is when politics, baseball, or religion may be the topic of conversation. I can find common ground with anyone in this world. But just because I can do this does not mean I need to do this.
It is amazing what you may learn about someone just from watching their body language or how they speak to another person. Sit on any park bench for at least 5 minutes and you will encounter a world of contradiction and surprise.
I love to people watch. Not everyone has negative signs. There are amazing people in this world who would not need a caution sign. I like to figure out what people's signs may read. I find this to be a great hobby when I have nothing else to do. Sometimes I am cynical, other times I am in awe. But always, it is a curious hobby to entertain. I try to not be judgemental; after all, would I want the strangers I am judging to judge me in the same light? I don't have that "give a damn" attitude some people are able to pull off. And it seems during different points in your life when you may be struggling with something, that is when you run into every Tom, Dick, and Harry who remind you of your oppression. It can also be moments when you needed to feel something, and happen to watch an exchange between 2 strangers that reminds you life is wonderful.
In a relationship I find holding hands to be very important to me. It is a gesture of each person protecting the other, wanting to touch each other, create a united force as one together. But when you are not a couple? It is taunting and mean. They don't know they are offending me, how could they? They are walking around in the Mary Poppins world of butterflies dancing in the sky, blue birds whistling a happy tune, and oblivious to my envious stares. To me, I see them leering at me, almost saying "Yeah, this is what you DON'T have, and so we are going to rub it in your face!" But avoiding the feelings of disdain for the couple's existence, I can look past the rainbows and butterflies they are seeing.
I can see a man who may be looking at his (insert official title of date/girlfriend/fiance/wife here) and be able to tell how he feels about her. The look in his eyes when she is not looking - is it a look of tenderness, a look of desire, a look of "I am the luckiest SOB in the world to have her at my side!" OR - is it "yeah, can't wait til this chic is gone", boredom, or dismissal.
I can see a woman who may be looking at her (insert official title of date/boyfriend/fiance/husband here) to see her thoughts and feelings. The look in her eyes when he is not looking - is it signifying a look of respect, admiration, adoration, "Hell yeah!" look. OR - is it "um...I am just really filling my time", dismay, etc.
It is the looks you give others when no one is looking that matter the most in people watching. That look when you can tell, feel, and see 2 people in love. That look when you see a mother watching her child proudly watch her kids take big kid steps, mixed with the look of worry at the same time that they may not be as needed in the future. You can see the nervousness a teen aged girl or boy may feel when in a group of kids and it is obvious they are trying to flirt with someone. The embrace between two friends, whether it be verbal or physical. One of the most endearing events is to watch a couple who are older, shuffling where ever they are going, holding hands, smiling, and just enjoying the other's company.
Body language is not often looked at highly enough by most people. The simple turn of the head, how close someone stands to you while talking, is their body facing you or turned away from you, are their legs crossed while sitting down and which way are they crossed. Do they look you the person in the eyes while speaking, over the shoulder of the other person, down to the floor, up in the air? Are they constantly playing with their phone, camera, electrical device instead of talking to the person they are sitting with? Do they seem interested in the conversation, or are they simply feigning interest? Someone can give you a compliment, but it is more their body language that will reveal their intention. Paying attention, and knowing the difference between genuine and insincere is the key.
How do you know the difference, though? How can you tell that what you are reading into is the true person? There have been times when I was wrong about my interpretations of someone else's body language. In those rare moments I am typically pleasantly surprised. Those moments are rare, however. This is not a sport for everyone, but for those that have either learned how to read others, or are gifted naturally it helps out immensely when avoiding people who should be avoided.
What would my caution sign read? "Caution - I watch people before engaging in conversation."
I watch people before I engage in conversation for my personal, social time and comfort. If I am meeting new people that are friends of friends, I become extremely introverted for a moment. I look at how they talk, walk, move, gesture. I determine if they are safe or scary. I will watch how the talk to the others to determine if they are schmoozing, snowballing, or being sincere. I will inspect the situation before talking to them, before possibly becoming a victim of an assaholic. I am okay standing in the shadows, on the sidelines, whatever you want to call the place I am at. The rare exception to this is when politics, baseball, or religion may be the topic of conversation. I can find common ground with anyone in this world. But just because I can do this does not mean I need to do this.
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