Thankfulness defined

Today is Thanksgiving. This is my 34th Thanksgiving, and of course I may not remember all those days, I am not new to the holiday. Every year I think of all I have in my life to be thankful for. This is not new. I do this on a regular basis. But in the season of this holiday, it becomes ever more present than other days, I suppose.

I am not really one for the holidays. I used to enjoy them, but after hardships like relationships falling apart during the holidays (I was dumped not once, but twice during random Christmas holidays), or family issues that pursue it seems each year I almost wish the season away. I wish for January when all the hulabaloo is over. This year is no different. I really am not looking forward to the holidays. While that may sound selfish, or somehow ungrateful, I will not be spending time with all the family I would like to make the holiday memorable. I will not be seeing the person I am dating to make it memorable. I will not be doing much other than hoping the season passes, and passes quickly.

In light of this, there are things I am thankful for. I am not completely void of feelings, and would be remiss if I didn't thank the Lord for all I have in my life.

I am thankful for my mötley crew of a family, in which I have learned how to love, how to express my emotions, and learned how to be accepted as I am, hot mess and all. I am thankful for not just the family I was born into, but also the family I had once been married into. I am thankful for all those who are called I mother, father, brothers, sisters, children.

There is no difference between blood and court documents issuing or removing marital binds when it comes to my family. Their love for me, their love for my children, and their love for us as a group has demonstrated such wonderful grace beyond what I could have ever imaged 13 years ago for those the world would call my ex-inlaws.

I am thankful for the person I am dating, and all the joy he brings in my life. All the pictures he sends me of random things in his life, the text messages, the calls, and the moments we are actually together. I am thankful to him for helping me see a different side of life, of the world, and of who I am just by knowing him.

I am thankful for my friends, without whom I would not be able to sometimes make it through my day. They offer me such encouragement, love, support, and help beyond my wildest dreams.

I am thankful for my job, and the method in which it allows me to pay my bills, learn something each day, and ability to see Glenn, family, friends.

I am thankful to have a roof over my head, and a vehicle to drive.

I am thankful to know I am where I am by the grace of the Lord, and I am thankful each day for the relationship I have with my Heavenly Father. Without His love, I would be lost and unable to love as I do. Without His grace, I would be hateful and unable to accept others. Without His forgiveness of my shortcomings, I would not be able to forgive those who have hurt me, or be able to look at the world as a place of opportunity.

I am thankful for every moment, both good and bad, that has led me to where I am today. For all those that hurt me, broke my heart, created dissension or only offered momentary support, they have all given me the gift of knowledge, the ability to forgive, and the path to where I am today.